Thursday, 23 June 2011

Why it's OK to be single.

Recently, every form of social media that I come into contact with contains either various public displays of affection (and I've already had a rant about that), discussions about weddings or, seemingly the other half of the population, moaning about being single. This, coupled with my disdain at advertising which often asks, literally, "are you 22, single and lonely?" (this is an actual advert on facebook) leads me to think that I must be mental. I love being single, and yet, society makes me feel ridiculous and like some sort of social deviant for feeling this way: Why am I not chasing after my Prince Charming? Why do I not cuddle my pillow and cry myself to sleep at night because I'm lonely? Why do I not go out intent to pull guys and feel absolutely gutted if I don't? Why do I not sit and cry my way through love songs?

Mainly because, and I'm sorry to say this guys, but being single is a hell of a lot more fun. And I mean a LOT more fun. You can say what you want, tell me it's because I haven't met the right guy or whatever, but I don't believe you. Being single rocks - I can do what I want to do with my evenings rather than have to consider a partner's obligations all the time, I can see my friends more often, I can make big decisions about my future without having to think about someone else, I can buy the furniture I want for my flat and, most importantly, I can starfish when I sleep at night and the duvet is aaaaaall mine. It has made my life a damn sight easier than it has ever been before, and I truly believe these last four months have been the absolute making of me and will continue to be. Nothing I have done in the last few months I could have done with a guy in tow so for me, right now, being able to be completely self-indulgent (and not in a bad way, you know what I mean) has made my life what it is.

Who knows how long this will last before the novelty starts to wear off but, now, I look at all of my friends who are coupled up, moving in together or engaged to be married and think how great it is for them but how that would have been the worst decision for me. I had all that handed to me on a plate in February but I walked away and I'm glad. Being single works for me and I think it has the potential to work for everyone. Even if is isn't what you want, the doors that open to you as a consequence are so immense that you have the opportunity to move on to bigger and better things.

To quote Marilyn Monroe, "sometimes good things have to fall apart so better things can fall together".

I just wish society saw this point of view and people stopped asking me how my love life is going and then feel sorry for me when I say I have no-one around. Because, seriously, what is there to be sorry for when being single means:

  • Having all the duvet and sleeping like a starfish every night;
  • Not having to put up with snoring!
  • Being able to watch what you want on TV regardless of how girly or trashy the programme is;
  • Choosing girly furniture and having cushions around without moaning;
  • Being able to go shopping on Saturdays, not stuck at football (I like football, but not all the time);
  • Seeing your friends a lot more, or at least spending an hour on the phone without being whinged at;
  • Not having your mood or confidence dictated by someone else;
  • Feeling no pressure in life, from when to get up to when to move in together etc;
  • Making meals for two and eating it all (I really should be fat...);
  • Not feeling guilty for spending a week's rent on shoes;
  • Not feeling obliged to share every single thought you have;
  • Being able to go 3 days without shaving your legs (I don't do this often but sometimes...);
  • Having a lazy day in on your own. We all need time to ourselves on occasions;
  • Not being given the third degree when you're seen in a facebook picture with another man, God forbid;
  • Not feeling obliged to have sex;
Ok, I could go on for ages and I need to go out now...

But moral of the story: relationships can be great, but so can being single. So enjoy it whilst it lasts. I know I will.


Nicole said...

Amen sister! I have my days where I'm slightly lonely but it's never really that bad. Plus I'm not in a hurry to get involved with a guy that is nice for a month or so and then shows their true colors for no reason at all. I'm not in a hurry for anything anyways or willing to settle for just anyone.

Classy Career Girl said...

Definitely agree with you! Hope you are having a great weekend!

Laura Wynn said...

haha, I agree! Single life is gooood! (I'm vising from last weeks Mingle Monday-youve got a great blog!)

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