Shared experiences.

It's funny, really, how blogging can make you see life for what it really is. Even when you feel alone, like you are the only person feeling the way you do, it makes you realise that hey, it's not only ok to feel like this, but pretty normal! I finally caught up with my favourite blogs today, and I would have to say, 3/5 of them had blogged saying exactly the same things that I have been thinking and feeling recently. It really was a massive comfort to realise I don't need to beat myself up about having a 'down' week.

We're all human, right?

For the last couple of weeks I have been finding it hard to stay positive. Life has gotten quite hard, and not because things are bad, but just because there is suddenly a lot of pressure from every avenue of my life (work, friends, health, relationships) and this has made me feel much less like my self. For example, earlier this week I spent 48 hours crying, almost constantly, and that is so unlike me. Normally, even when I'm in a shit mood I strop around the house like a grumpy toddler before eventually picking myself up, but this didn't happen. I also found myself with no inclination to work, chat with friends, blog... all those things I usually love. Things were just not right in my life; for the first time in ages I felt truly awful.

Today, however, I'm feeling much better. Yesterday was my birthday and I had a lovely day, feeling really loved and appreciated by everyone in my life. It really made me smile, and today I have had a lot of fun meeting friends, planning hen dos and taking some 'Extreme Reading' photos for my class (I wish I could share them, I actually got to go in an Ice Cream van. Exciting!) so hopefully, just hopefully, the fog has cleared and I can go back to being my normal, sunshiney self.

I hope, if you have felt the way I have in any way recently, that you start to see the sunshine soon.

Relaxing Sunday.

This must be the first day I've had off since August. No school work, no housework, no Christmas shopping, no travelling... just nothing. Normally this makes me anxious, I guess because I generally live my life at 100mph, however today I didn't feel a shred of guilt or anxiety. Just pure relaxation and indulgence.

It has definitely made me realise that one of my new year resolutions has to be to make this a more frequent occurrence. I want to get back into those hobbies I have neglected so badly over the last few months which I really enjoyed doing today. I've baked for the first time in months (chocolate fudge, nomnom), I've knitted and I've given my little blog a HTML overhaul. I've started re-reading my favourite book, watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (the old version, of course!) and had a long bath just for the hell of it.

I will definitely be making more of an effort to prioritise this sort of day more often. I should have more spare time now I'm rocking the single boat, and seeing as I have no intention of finding another man any time soon (yes, I'm still going through my "men are wankers" phase), I should have plenty enough time. No, strike that: I will have enough time. I need to find more time, I need to regain my life...

So, how have you all spent your Sunday? I hope you've had as relaxing a day as mine! 

P.S. Any feedback on the new blog design would be much appreciated (does it look fine in IE, Chrome, Firefox? etc).

Happy Sunday.

Happy Sunday everyone!

I've had an absolutely lovely day to round off a great weekend. I went out for the afternoon with a couple of the other teachers from school and one brought her little'un along. We went to Greenwich park to play on the slide and swings (and the adults blatantly enjoyed this more than littlie in the cold), then we went for lunch in an absolutely lovely restaurant where I had a goats cheese tart with caramelised onions and rocket salad with dripping chips on the side. (I realise you didn't need/want to know that detail, but I tend to remember places and events through the food I ate. Is that weird?)

It was such a lovely, relaxing day and so nice to finally get to know some new people. Obviously I see everyone at work and we get on when we're chatting in the staff room, but having friends to call upon outside of school really is my aim right now and it was lovely to have that today. I think this is another one of the many things I missed out on through having to traipse across London to see my ex every weeken but now that my time is my own, I can make new friends.

Yay for me :)

Easy like a Sunday morning.

The most depressing feeling is waking up on a Sunday morning, thinking "ahh, bliss, another day off", before realising that actually, your job has taken over so much of what you do that you will spend the entire day doing work.

Don't get me wrong, I love my job but man do I need to reclaim my weekends. I already work 12-hour days plus marking at home during the week and, seriously, I cannot do this six days a week without burning out pretty soon. I'm already starting to feel the pressure and the stress and whilst that comes with the job, I need to be able to leave that at the door on Friday evenings to chill out, recover and regroup over the weekend ready to be the best teacher I can be for the kids on Monday morning. And right now, with things as they are, I can't imagine being the most amazing teacher tomorrow because the stress makes me feel like the teaching is the inconvenient bit between the paperwork and marking and that is not a good attitude to have.

So, as much as it sucks, I'll work all day today and get everything done for the week. Then, this week, I can get ready for next week and hopefully, reclaim my weekend.

Actually, I'm going to go and make plans for the entire of next weekend to make sure that I am too busy to do much work. If that doesn't give me a kick up the backside to get on with my work this weekend then I don't know what will.

Note to self (because I seem to have forgotten)
Weekends should involve...

• Lazy lie-ins on BOTH days;
• Yummy, indulgent breakfasts (I'm feeling the love for american-style pancakes);
• Seeing the boyfriend AND seeing my friends (not one or the other);
• A lazy nandos lunch;
• A cheeky bit of post-pay day shopping;
• Sitting, at some point, and just doing nothing;
• A long, indulgent bath with bubbles;
• Catching up with the family via phone/skype etc.

I can't fricking wait...

What would your ideal weekend involve?